Coffee with Jesus: A Letter From Heaven
From the moment I got saved, I had an incredible passion and hunger to hear from Him. I had such love for Jesus, such a deep yearning and longing to know Him, and my heart burned within me to hear from Him.
They asked each other, “Were not our hearts burning within us while he talked with us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us?” (Luke 24:32 NIV)
The passion to hear His voice burned in me day and night. That’s when I began to position myself to hear from Him. I became very well acquainted with my bedroom floor! I had been told that the only way the Lord speaks is through His Word. Absolutely, He speaks through His Word, but there was a deep yearning in my heart to be engaged so deeply with Him that every minute of every day, no matter where I was, I would hear Him speak and see Him moving. Besides Jesus, my favorite biblical character was always Joseph. I was drawn to the story of Joseph and how God spoke to him in his dreams (see Gen. 37). Later on in his life, he was positioned in different places to engage with the heart of God and interpret what the Lord was saying through dreams.The fire in me continued to burn. The cry of my heart was, “There has to be more!” Day and night He would show up, and His presence was so strong, His power so tangible, that I would weep for hours in His presence as He filled me with His Spirit. He was so close, like waves crashing over me, one after another. His love was so thick, so warm, so life-giving and soothing like honey. I would encounter His heart night after night, yet I would hear nothing.
I would encounter His heart night after night, yet I would hear nothing.
Day after day, the hunger to hear from Him rose so much that I began to get discouraged. I would spend so long in the Word, but that “light bulb moment” just hadn’t happened. I never felt my breath taken away from knowing deep in the core of me that the King of kings and Lord of lords just spoke to me.Until one night.He showed up again! His presence was so heavy, His power flowing through my body so strongly. I never wanted to leave. And then I heard a whisper, so quiet in my ears, yet so loud in my heart: “I love you!”
Those three little words catapulted me into a journey of discovery. A journey of deep intimacy like I had never experienced before. Every day, I would wake and feel the invitation to “come away” and be with Him and hear what was on His heart. It really was the invitation into the divine dance of His heart. To be drawn in so close, to hear the rhythm of His heartbeat and partner with it. To be in the place of intimacy with Him where the words from His heart and the whispers of His love brought me to life over and over again. Each word flowing from His mouth was like the shock from a defibrillator bringing the dry, dead places of my heart to life. Each word was like honey, soothing the hurting places, the places where the enemy had whispered his lies to cage me and keep me from my beloved. Everything suddenly started to rattle and shake as I would hear such words of love and truth fill my heart. The chains began to fall off one by one as His words of truth enveloped my heart and soul and His Word came down like a hammer.
“Does not my word burn like fire?” says the Lord. “Is it not like a mighty hammer that smashes a rock to pieces?” (Jeremiah 23:29 NLT)
This season changed my life. The season of great awakening. The realization that He longed to speak to me and I could live daily in that place of deep communion with Him. He actually invites me into a place of such deep communion that I get to hear His secrets—what He is dreaming about for me, my life, and the lives of others.
There’s a private place reserved for the lovers of God, where they sit near Him and receive the revelation-secrets of His promises (Psalms 25:14).
Your Positioning Is Key
No matter what my day entailed, every afternoon I would feel His invitation to “walk with Him.” I began to awaken to the truth of this glorious journey before me of intimacy with Jesus and hearing His voice. In that season, the key for me was my positioning.
I let go of the striving and ‘trying to hear’ and the anxiety that brought, and I simply abandoned myself to be with Him.
I let go of the striving and “trying to hear” and the anxiety that brought, and I simply abandoned myself to be with Him. Whether I heard anything or not. I was chasing after His heart and His presence, spending time with Him, loving on Him, ministering to Him with my worship whether I heard anything or not. The invitation into the divine romance took my hunger to an even greater level—hunger for the closeness of His presence and His power that flowed through me and touched me. It was a fire that burned in me so strongly that I cried out to Him, “Even if You don’t speak to me, I will chase after You!” I was moving to the place of just enjoying Him. Like having a cup of coffee with a friend and enjoying their presence and learning about them, so it was with Him. A whole new journey opened up before me. My hunger for Jesus catapulted me into some of the greatest adventures of my life with Him.
Even if You don’t speak to me, I will chase after You!
Coffee with Jesus
So there I was, my heart burning with the words that I had heard from His heart. That whisper was so clear in my heart and rung in my ears—so soft, so loving, so tender, yet so loud and weighty that like thunder it would cause mountains to tremble. The peace that came from hearing those three little words, “I love you,” was like nothing I had ever experienced.
God thunders with His voice wondrously, doing great things which we cannot comprehend (Job 37:5 NASB).
So with my heart burning, I chased Him. Every afternoon I would walk through the luscious green fields, the wide open spaces, near where I lived—the wind blowing against my face and through my hair as I cried out to Him to know Him. I was so hungry for Him, I decided to make even more room in my life for Him to speak and meet with me, so I began my weekly coffee dates with Jesus. I took my Bible and my journal and I sat in a café for hours on end, imagining Jesus sitting on the other side of the table, and I asked questions. These questions became the tipping point of my walk with Him.
“What are You dreaming about today, Jesus?”
“What do You want to say to me today?”
In the quiet little café with the aroma of freshly brewed coffee rising out of my mug, I found the place of being completely undone—undone by love.
As I asked Him the two questions burning in my heart, a sense overwhelmed me so strongly. It was as if this strong feeling was shouting, “Pick up your pen and write.”
I picked up my pen and opened my journal to a fresh, crisp, clean page. This heralded the beginning of a completely new chapter of my life—a new chapter of intimacy. I took a deep breath and felt like a tidal wave just began to flow through my hand.I began to write line after line after line of beautiful truth. I wrote so quickly that at times my hand could not keep up. The pages were wet with my tears as I wrote, knowing the moment had come. I was in a holy space, a divine moment of connecting with His heart, and truth poured out.
“How delighted I am in you.”
“I am so proud of you.”
“You are My beautiful daughter; I rejoice over you with singing.
”I was suddenly immersed in and surrounded by love and acceptance like I had never known on this earth. The tears poured down from my face; my hands were charged with power; my writing was so scribbly because I could not keep up with the waterfall of declarations of truth pouring out over me. My heart exploded with joy as I wrote. “It’s Him! He’s speaking!” I knew with every fiber of my being that I had connected with the heart of God. I wrote page after page after page of promises until my hand came to rest and I knew He was done.
I looked down at my journal, and through tears I saw a beautiful love letter from heaven to me.
I looked down at my journal, and through tears I saw a beautiful love letter from heaven to me. A letter like one written to a little girl from a proud father. This letter of love, my very own, was from my Father in heaven to me.Fear was a giant in my life that suffocated me in so many ways, especially when hearing from God. So the moment of doubt crept in: “Was that just me? Did I make that up?” Within a moment I came to my senses. Every line spoken I could have added a Bible verse to. It was such beautiful truth, and with every word I came alive! Such love and such peace like I had never experienced. Every word ignited a fire in my heart and soul that could not be contained. Coffees with Jesus became my favorite parts of the week.
The invitation from His heart continued to beckon me: “Come away and be with Me.” I longed to be with Him. Afternoons became a great delight as I walked with Him through luscious green fields, up and down hills, and I would ask Him questions. For years and years of coffee dates and afternoon walks, He showed me His relentless pursuit of me and my heart. He unveiled to me His yearning heart that longed to speak to me more than I wanted to hear. I realized that my hunger for Him attracted Him. I realized that He wasn’t waiting for me to “get it right” and then He would speak. I was awakened to the revelation that He is a God who is so longing for deeper relationship with me that He would work in me, calibrate my heart, teach me sensitivity, and journey with me to hear from Him.
I realized that He wasn’t waiting for me to ‘get it right’ and then He would speak. He is so longing for deeper relationship with me that He would work in me, calibrate my heart, teach me sensitivity, and journey with me to hear from Him.
On this journey, all of the swirling questions, “Does He still speak today? Does He only speak through the Word?” were so clearly answered. He absolutely speaks through His Word, but I now understood that He also speaks in the still small voice.After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper (1 Kings 19:12 NIV).
Day after day, week after week, He would whisper words of truth to me. He began to speak to me about my destiny and what I was called to, igniting in me the desire to partner with Him to see the world changed for Jesus. As His whispers became more and more frequent, like injections of hope and life, I realized something significant about what happens when He speaks. When He speaks, it activates my faith and my ability to dream. Every time He speaks, His whispers bring me to life, catapult me into greater freedom, and ignite in me the spark of Matthew 19:26:Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible” (NIV).The calibration happened little by little through each whisper I heard, each verse I read, each story about Jesus and His life, each way He spoke to me on that journey. He was calibrating my perspective, my reality. Every word that flowed from His mouth and heart always brought me up higher. Every word cheered me on in this journey taking me from glory to glory, and His plans for me were so much greater than I realized (see 2 Cor. 3:18; Jer. 29:11). It was beyond anything I had ever hoped, imagined, or dreamed.
That is what the Scriptures mean when they say, “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him” (1 Corinthians 2:9 NLT).
Never doubt God’s mighty power to work in you and accomplish all this. He will achieve infinitely more than your greatest request, your most unbelievable dream, and exceed your wildest imagination! He will outdo them all, for his miraculous power constantly energizes you (Ephesians 3:20).
Lana Vawser
